But everybody knows that she throws herself in front of a train!

Having a blog means I get to do the Friday Five again. I did two because I wanted to, so this week's is more like a Friday Ten.

This is the current one:

1. When you were a student, would you have been more likely to turn your test in first or last?

First.

2. Question 1 on a test can be narrowed down to either A or B (you’re sure it’s one or the other). Question 12 on the test can be narrowed down to the same two answers. You know one is A and the other is B. Do you go for the all-or-nothing guess (choosing A for one and B for the other) or do you play it safe and take one correct (choosing A for both questions)?

All-or-nothing. But I don't cheat on tests, so why would I even know?

3. Are you more of a multiple-choicer, a true-falser, a fill-in-the-blanker, or a free-responder?

I was a good test-taker in general, but multiple-choice is easiest for me.

4. What are your thoughts on standardized college aptitude tests such as the SAT?

The SAT got me into the college of my choice, so I like it. It's also an accurate predictor of college success. Right now I'm more interested in standardized English tests because I have to teach students to pass them. I don't like most of them, but they're important. They keep weaker students from spending time and money on programs of study that they simply won't be able to handle, no matter how good they are at conversational English or untimed readings. I don't like immigration tests at all, though.

5. In the past week, in what ways have you been tested?

Ugh. Ugh ugh ugh. What an appropriate question for this week. My tolerance for cold weather has been tested (passed). My ability to walk on icy streets has been tested (failed). My patience with coworkers has been tested (barely passed). My ability to deal with students who are lazy, annoying, and vaguely creepy has been tested (passed so far). My professionalism in the face of serious problems at work that might leave me out of a job has been tested (we'll see). My tolerance for pain was tested when my stomach tried to digest itself (passed due to oatmeal). And, uh, my memory for Simpsons trivia was tested last Friday (at least I passed this one with flying colors).


This one occurred at the end of 2006, which makes sense. Question 1 will spoil the ending of AI for you, so you've been warned.

1. What film did you think had the most annoying, maddening, preposterous, disappointing, or idiotic ending?

AI. I will complain about this every chance I get (which is why I chose this one from the old Friday Fives). The first part of the film was brilliant. There were two points at which I thought it could have ended and still been brilliant. The first was when he jumped into the water (having established earlier that he is not waterproof). The second was when he was under the sea wishing to be a real boy.

There are a lot of movies whose endings I object to (off the top of my head: Sleepless in Seattle, Roman Holiday, Pretty Woman, North by Northwest, Contact). I even disliked the way "Friends" ended because I wanted them to move to France so that Emma could be bilingual. But AI is orders of magnitude worse because it could have been so, so good.


2. What is the most recent example in your life of something coming to an unexpected (or unwelcome) end and then turning into an even better beginning?

Hmm...nothing yet. Perhaps I'll be able to say this about the King's Quest series when the fan-made "sequel" comes out. I have really high expectations for that.

3. How do you feel about your rear end? (alternate question for those who think this is just far too inappropriate: How do you usually spend your sitting-around-on-your-rear-end days?)

Once I went shopping for jeans and one woman selling jeans shouted that it would be impossible to find jeans that would fit me. Despite this, I am quite attached to it. It's famine-resistant and keeps me comfortable on long train rides.

4. Some people read the endings of books before they invest time, energy, and emotion into the rest of them. What are your thoughts about this practice?

I think it's completely insane. In fact, it seems so wrong to me that I can't even explain why it's wrong because in order to do that I'd have to understand the arguments in favor, and I can't even begin to.

5. How would you like to end each day, and how do you actually end each day?

I'd like to end each day in my castle in Sweden after finding some priceless artifact or on one of my trains through the ocean on my way to somewhere interesting, or back to said castle after visiting somewhere interesting. Either way, I'd be curled up under a fluffy down comforter with a good book and hot chocolate (and I wouldn't have to get up again because I'd have self-cleaning teeth). Actually, I end each day by going home from work, wasting time on the internet, and attempting to sleep. Which I should do now.